Sunday, December 31, 2006


Self-analysis 2006


Physically
Haven done any serious cardio-vascular workout since disrupting from army... so I guess my already lousy stamina is 惨不忍睹 now... Please jio me out for jogging/swimming...

Psychologically
I think how I function mentally is quite weird... I've got imaginary worlds stored in the back of my head... and I frequently play out the stories of the characters in it like a movie in my head, especially when I'm bored/cannot sleep/stressed(need to be distracted from the stressful situation at hand)...yup..that's how I handle anxiety/loneliness/boredom/insomnia... I also need short term goals to keep me going. For example, I need to have something to look forward to in the next few days/weeks, be it an outing/project/event/holiday.. or else i will be damn sian and unmotivated..

Emotionally
I think I've got a low EQ. I am extremely impatient and I think I have a short fuse when I'm tired/stressed. I allow my gut feelings/mood to affect my decisions too much. I seriously nid to improve in this area... so that I wun lose my patience to patients in the future... and another weird thing is that I am extremely sensitive to sound when just after I wake up... I get irritated by even the smallest of noises... that's why I rather sacrifice sleep and wake up extra early to avoid the morning crowd..

Academically
I think I'm still managing well so far.. "Well" for me means pass comfortably.. seriously I'm not aiming for distinction or dean's list or wadever.. I'm just satisfied wif a decent grade... and I seriously think I got dean's list for last yr becos I was lucky... this year, my grades so far are just average... so please dun give me pressure or have certain expectations of me... I just wan to get a grade that is proportional to the work I put in... that's all =)

Financially
I think I'm managing quite okay-ly in this aspect bah... You wun see me driving a car / eating in a posh restaurant anytime soon, but I can still afford to treat myself to a nice meal once in a while, and mebbe pamper myself wif a gadget/upgrade my com once in a very very long while... but the outlook is not very optimistic lar... cos i may have to cut down on my tuition assignments once i enter clinical years and i still have my study loan to 解决 when I graduate...

Socially
I have a high activation energy barrier in this aspect. Meaning I find it very hard to interact wif people I dunno... I sometimes think I'm damn 哑巴 especially around ppl I not 熟 wif.. another aspect I have to improve if I want to be able to tokkok wif patients in the future.. this also explains why my social circle is so small... i nid to make more frens.. 好友满天下.. haha

Aesthetic/misc skills
Rusty. Because of the increasing workload, I'm finding less and less time to embark on non-academic projects... so I'm on the decline in skills like web-design, flash animation, music...etc... hopefully I can remedy this... and becos I promised someone... I shall go and practise my guzheng... hopefully this appeases someone...

Forecast for 2007
Extremely challenging year ahead, with periods of extreme stress predicted. More CAs, more cramming/mugging, more exams! Clinicals coming! Even more mugging and stress! But also looking forward to more fun and more gatherings =) Anyway life would be boring w/o some challenges rite? 不愿途中无波浪,无挑战. 逾经挫折,生命逾灿烂!

posted by nwxiang at 9:54 PM | 0 comments


Thanks


Thanks to da jia for coming to THE event... thanks for helping me carry things, clear the room and wadever... =)

Edit: Cos I was too shag to make a long post last night, I'll just add on here... I realised that there is a ton of snacks left in my house... someone pls organise another outing soon so I can get rid of all the tidbits... and yah, I din forget.. 78 guys pay me $23, non-78 guys $12, pangseh kias $11...thanks..hehe

posted by nwxiang at 12:32 AM | 0 comments


Friday, December 29, 2006


Extreme makeover..of my room




posted by nwxiang at 11:07 PM | 2 comments


Tuesday, December 26, 2006


Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag


Wahhh I 3 days nvr use com liao... now damn shiok..haha withdrawal symptoms.. Sorry for not replying all the Christmasy smses... cos I've been busy painting my room for the past 3 days..

After 4 coats of paint (1 layer of white to cover the previous colour), my room is now this colour!!! Woohoo!!! Its now so bright that I keep thinking someone left the lights on....

My new black bookshelf from Ikea will be coming tomorrow!!! It will look so chio against the wall...haha I intend to buy a black wardrobe and a black study table also... but ikea dun have nice ones...so will have to go some furniture shop...And I need a painting to hang over the empty wall beside my bed... so if you all got any nice paintings to recommend or inspired to paint one urself for me, please do so! (i'll prefer the painting to be in black and white)

Mebbe if I fail my med course I can go be interior designer next time... haha...

posted by nwxiang at 11:50 PM | 0 comments


Thursday, December 21, 2006


Why?


Why must wait until I lose my temper then got people reply me? Why some ppl dun even wan to reply even after I 发火? Reply so hard meh? Will die meh? Why must force me to use crude language?

Lemme give you all a short tutorial on how not to pangseh people.

Lesson one. Never make promises you can't keep. Never make appointments you cannot turn up. Simple?

Lesson two. Yes means yes, no means no. Coming means coming. Not coming means not coming. Dun say one thing and mean another thing. Make life easy for others pls. Simple?

Lesson three. First come first serve. When you have agreed on something, reject all subsequent things that conflict with the agreed appointment. Simple?

Lesson four. Turn up. Simple?

Remedial lesson. "Sorry" means nothing. NOTHING. You get it? Once you have pangseh-ed people, you have already wasted their time and efforts. "Sorry" doesn't remedy anything.

Hopefully this wakes up the idea of some people. Sorry if this has caused any distress. This is not intended as personal attack. Just that I'm pissed off with people's fickle-mindedness/last-minuteness/taking of promises lightly.

posted by nwxiang at 1:14 AM | 0 comments


Wednesday, December 20, 2006


Dark, Stormy Night


About 30mins ago, I left the warmth and comfort of my home and ventured out into the black, stormy night. Armed with only an umbrella, I waited for 10mins in the cold and deserted void deck, buffeted by the merciless rain and wind. Before I did what I came out to do.

To pay the cab fare for my sis.

In the end, she had enuff money to pay the cab fare herself. Wad a nice gor I am.

posted by nwxiang at 1:04 AM | 0 comments


Monday, December 18, 2006


Open close open close


Rain, stop raining, rain, stop raining, rain.

Close windows, open windows, close windows, open windows, close windows.

I'm shagged out from running around the house opening and closing windows.

posted by nwxiang at 5:28 PM | 0 comments


Friday, December 15, 2006


"天将降大任于斯人..."


Always liked to remind myself of this quote when I'm feeling stressed/screwed up/pissed off/sad etc.. But somehow always cannot remember the complete version...was cleaning up my room when I found a slip of paper containing the complete version of this quote.. so here it is:

天将降大任于斯人,
必先苦其心志,
劳其筋骨,
饿其体肤,
空乏其身,
行拂乱其所为,
所以动心忍性,
增益其所不能.



posted by nwxiang at 12:08 AM | 0 comments


Wednesday, December 13, 2006


Think I think too much

K lar...I think I think too much already... sorry to have alarmed anyone.. and thanks for the concern... hopefully the tests turn out normal..

posted by nwxiang at 12:17 AM | 0 comments


Tuesday, December 12, 2006


"What would you do if you had x months left to live?"

Its been almost 10 months since cells from my thyroid have been sucked out by a big needle and placed under the microscope. I went for my follow-up today, and these are the words that are stuck in my head: "Thyroid lumps are no fun. It's a lifetime of monitoring. And we are most worried in young people because it may turn out to be papillary carcinoma."

In English, it means: "It may be cancer."

And I have palpable lymph nodes. Yes, palpable lymph nodes. Even the most mediocre medical student knows that palpable lymph nodes are not good news. And I dun have a recent infection. Which means that the nodes may be due to something more sinister.

So I can't help but think...what would I do if I was told that I have x months left to live? I really dunno. So much to do, so little time. I think the first feeling I will get is guilt. 觉得很对不起父母. Spent so much time, effort and money on me, but I cannot repay them. And there are just so many other things... so many things I have not done..so many things I want to do..so many dreams unfinished... I haven even had my first kiss.. Somemore cancer is not a nice way to die... too long and drawn out... a heart attack would be quicker and cleaner.. and I wonder too.. who will come to my funeral.. or mebbe I shouldn't have one.. save money for my parents.. (the checkup alone today already made me $200+ poorer)

Ok I shall stop being morbid. Haiz...its raining again. So dark and gloomy. I think I shall go and take a nap.

posted by nwxiang at 5:01 PM | 0 comments


Monday, December 11, 2006


God or not?

Happened to chance upon an interesting book when I went Kino few days ago.. Its titled "The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins. Wiki has an article on it (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_God_Delusion)

Yup...I flipped thru the book and read abit on the Ultimate 747 gambit. In that chapter, the author attacked a statement made by Fred Hoyle (a British Astronomer) that the "probability of life originating on earth is no greater than the chance that a hurricane sweeping through a scrap-yard would have the luck to assemble a Boeing 747".

Wiki-ed up abit on this and I found 2 other articles on Fred Hoyle and the Triple-Alpha process So for those who are too lazy to read the articles..lemme summarise abit..

The triple alpha process is the process by which three helium nuclei are transformed into carbon, which in turn forms the basis of existence of carbon-based lifeforms like us. The conditions at which this reaction occurs are highly specific and thus statistically unlikely. Fred Hoyle also calculated that the chance of obtaining the required set of enzymes for even the simplest living cell was one in 1040,000. In addition to the 747 analogy, Hoyle also compared the chance of obtaining even a single functioning protein by chance combination of amino acids to a solar system full of blind men solving Rubik's Cube simultaneously.

Did somemore research...the probability of being strike by lightning (based on lightning victims statistics in the US given by the National Lightning Safety Institute) is 1:280 000. World record for being struck by lightning is 7 times (Roy Sullivan...poor guy...although he survived all the strikes), making that probability about 1:1040.

Seems like the chance that life beginning w/o supernatural interference is not very high huh? But then again...as long as the probability is above 0, it can happen. Right?

Tempted to buy that book...but i think it costs about $30+..

posted by nwxiang at 12:32 AM | 0 comments


Friday, December 08, 2006


Interesting (and lengthy) quiz



posted by nwxiang at 11:33 PM | 3 comments


Tuesday, December 05, 2006


眼底星空


Click to enlarge

A shot out of the kitchen window one night when I was unable to sleep (becos of a headache). Sorry for the bad composition because I dun have a tripod.. Could only rest the camera on the window sill while using 30sec shutter.. Hence the ugly wall and window panes..

Looking at the night sky into the vast blackness of infinity just makes one feel so small... And those little spots of ethereal light makes my mind wonder... how far away are these stars? How long did it take for the light to reach me? 10years? Or a 1000years? Do these stars still exist? Is there life out there? Is there a purpose to this vast infiniteness that we call the Universe? Sometimes I try to think of answers. Sometimes I just let the wonder wash over me...

Sometimes I also wonder whether anyone else is looking at the sky at the same moment, thinking the same thoughts.....but i guess not bah..only I'm so boliao..

posted by nwxiang at 8:52 PM | 7 comments


Sunday, December 03, 2006


Screwy Tagboard

How come my tagboard become so screwed up...lazy to check the code...mebbe it will spontaneously heal after some time..

posted by nwxiang at 1:13 AM | 0 comments


Friday, December 01, 2006


Thanks

Luckily my thursday didn't end up wif me stoning at home alone... Xie xie to the people who made my day..=)

posted by nwxiang at 1:27 AM | 0 comments